My body is rejecting me.
I can’t stay well.
If you’ve been following a long for a while, you now that I tore my ACL last spring. I tried healing it with PRP (it worked on my ankle). That didn’t work, but I could function well enough to workout and run… so I decided not to have the surgery.
My PT warned me that when you tear one ACL and don’t fix it, the other is more likely to go. Naturally, I thought “that won’t happen to ME.” I’m strong! I’m in good shape! I’m invincible. (Spoiler alert: I’m NOT invincible.)
I am a statistic. Because my right knee isn’t stable, I always depend of my left knee to start, stop, step up, etc. When I tried to stop on the softball field last weekend, my foot stopped and my knee went backwards. Thinking about it makes me nauseous. It popped SO loud that the people in the dugout heard it. *barf*
The scientific reason is that one injury causes an interruption of the normal neuropathway in the non affected leg, therefore increasing ones risk of rupturing the 2nd ACL (on the other leg).
I’m beyond upset. I was just starting to feel really good again. My knees were better, another issue I’d been dealing with was easing up… and then this. The gym is my anxiety relief. It relaxes me. It’s MY time. Not only have I lost that for a bit, but I can’t even go for a walk. AND – when I have the surgery – it’ll be 6-9 months before I’m back to “normal.” FML.
I realize I’m being a bit dramatic. First world problems, right? It’ll get better, it’s not the end of the world. It’s just been a rough few weeks and this is the icing.
Did anyone read Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day as a child? That’s how I feel. (If you haven’t read this, buy it for your kids… or yourself.)
Next step: consult with specialists and get the MRI. It could be ACL or MCL or both. Good times.
Breakfast:
The usual morning cocktail, followed by my vitamin gummies and coffee.
Needless to say, I haven’t felt much like eating. I started off with a mocha matcha latte. I followed my recipe, but added a teaspoon of cocoa. It was delicious!
Post-latte, I decided on eggs and bread. I hobbled to the kitchen and fried an egg in the pan with 2 egg whites.
I was too lazy to toast the bread, but I did manage to add truffle salt to the eggs. That’ll cheer anyone up!
Lunch:
I still didn’t feel like eating. So this.
https://www.instagram.com/p/BUaPQX4lxdU/
Have I mentioned that we still haven’t gone to the grocery store after being in New Mexico last week? When there’s no food in the house, this happens:
Not that this is bad dinner. I love making boards.
This one was sliced turkey, zucchini, cucumber, hummus, truffle balsamic pearls, leftover baguette, aged gruyere, and blue cheese with honey. Plus a glass of wine (it was a Vegas-sized pour 😉 ).
Dessert:
Dark chocolate. No pic.
[Tweet “When you tear one ACL… the other will likely follow. An injured #WIAW link up.”]
Make sure to link up to Jenn’s WIAW baby below! (WIAW will be here only for a few weeks.)
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Now accepting (begging for) Netflix/Amazon recommendations!
Have you ever had surgery? I’ve only done my boobs. 😉
What do you eat when you don’t feel like eating anything?
Laura! I am so sorry. My heart just hurts for you, so whine all you want. You’re not being dramatic! My workout time is my relax time and de-stress session each day too, so I totally get it. But the important thing to do right now is to just take care of yourself and heal fast so you can feel better and be more mobile again. I will be praying for you! Let me know if you need anything, and keep up the chocolate matcha mix… love it!
Thanks Heather. At least I can hobble to the gym now. HA!
ugh, I am so super sorry this is happening to you right now! I hope you feel better and recover really soon.
Ugh – this truly sucks and even though it’s a “first world problem” is a big problem when the gym is your happy place. Don’t discount that. You’re allowed to wallow and feel like shit for a little bit. I’m so sorry and I can only hope you come up with some super simple recipes I can actually make as a result of this 🙂 #selfish
Feel better my friend!!
I’ve been the queen of simple… it’s gotten so bad that even Vegas has been cooking! Not that she’s a bad cook, she just doesn’t do it. Thank you though. I’ll live vicariously through you.
Ah I’m so sorry!! That sounds so painful and discouraging! Rest well and get better soon!
Laura, I am so sorry to hear about your knee! I had knee and ankle surgery about five years ago and it took about 6 months to recover. But you are strong, you’ll get there! Remember it’s only temporary and use the time away from the gym to take up a new hobby.
I’m sorry to hear you had to go through all that! It gives me some hope… you seem to be killing it with no problems now!
I’m sorry, girl. That sucks.
Thanks friend. Bah.
That looks like a pretty good dinner spread to me! Even if you did have groceries! When I can’t exercise I always throw myself a mini pity party and then move on. But the pity party in a necessity- just sayin 😉
The pity party did help a little. 😉 I’m over it now though!
Sorry to hear about your injury, that’s rough. It happened to one of my good friends a couple years ago and she just completed an Ironman earlier this year so I’m sure you will also come back stronger!! Sending you positive vibes!
An Ironman?! That makes me feel SO much better. Thank you. 🙂
Tore my meniscus last April. I couldn’t wait to have the surgery! The 3 weeks of non activity leading up to the surgery was misery! I don’t think my family could have handled me much longer than that because I was going crazy. The best thing about the surgery was going to PT and getting in the zero gravity treadmill. I missed my running buddies but I was so happy to sweat again on that zero G. Good luck!!! I feel your pain!
The doc thinks I did my ACL and meniscus. Will know more tomorrow… are you all better now? I didn’t even think of the zero gravity, but yessss! My PT has one in his office, but I’ve only gotten to do that freebie 15 min trial so far.
Ran on the zero G, did strength training. Trained super smart coming back.. First 5k back… managed a sub 20. Set half marathon PR 6 months post surgery and marathon PR 7 months post surgery. Occasional sorenes from arthritis but surgery was the best thing I did!!!! Good luck!
OMG – really?! My fastest 5K ever is only a 21… a 20 would be a miracle. LOL! You really did make me feel SO much better. I can’t thank you enough!
Ugh so sorry to hear about the ACL. I’m off to the ortho this morning to find out what’s happening with my knee and hopefully get a diagnosis of the pain. It is so debilitating isn’t it. Fingers crossed you won’t have to wait long for the surgery.
What did you find out about your knee? I hope it wasn’t anything serious!
Ah that really sucks! As someone who has also torn her ACL and had the surgery, I say do it. You are young and strong and you will heal quickly. I am so much stronger now than before I had the surgery. Also sorry it totally sucks 🙁
That makes me feel SO much better. Thanks for sharing your experience… it means a lot seeing hoe you kill it every day. You work harder than I did pre-ACL!
I’m sorry to hear you’re not feeling well—my right hamstring-glute attachment is my injury nemesis, so I hear you. Sending you happy healing vibes. Also, thank you for reminding me of truffle salt for eggs and that boards for dinner is a thing I can do : )
Thanks Jess. That hamstring injury is a tough one – those never seem to heal right.
It made me sad to see you on crutches, but I’ll be praying for healing. God made our bodies, and He can knit them back together. It’s been amazing how my body has been so hurt from my eating disorder, and yet the Lord has restored so much in His mercy.
My dad was just talking about on Sunday, how we aren’t invincible. It was a good reminder, because sometimes I do feel ‘invincible’ but I know I’m not. O_O
Thank you so much, Emily. 🙂
Think Vegas will come to Cleveland and pour my glass of wine…after she’s done taking care of you of course.
I think you should just come here and make me granola while I’m in recovery. We’ll all work together to teach Ave to pour. 😉
Do you know how many hugs I am sending you right now? And how much bourbon??
I’ll take extras of both!!!
Laura, you poor thing. I’m so sorry you are dealing with this. Having an injury can seem like the worst thing ever — but oftentimes we come back stronger. Thank you for hosting the eats party today — I haven’t joined in FOREVER!!! I’d say Happy Wednesday, but instead, it seems for fitting to say — be well, friend. 🙂
I’m so glad you joined up again! I love seeing what all the mamma’s to be are enjoying (YES to breakfast pizza!). And thank you… here’s to bouncing back!
I’m so sorry to hear this. Thinking of you! Last summer I thought I had torn something but it ended up being knee arthritis, something I’m learning to “manage” as my doc told me.
Thanks Marsha! I’ve had arthritis in both knees for years… I do collagen, gelatin, and turmeric every day and that seems to help!
Oh no! I had no idea that tearing one ACL could put the other at risk. Take care of yourself, Laura!
They told me it might happen when I decided not to have surgery on the first one… I just didn’t believe them. Oops…
I’m sorry. I know very little about people knees, but I do know we had this problem with my family dog’s ACL. We had to get them both replaced because when one goes, they both usually go.
That is so horrible. I don’t know how I would deal if I had to stay away from exercise for an extended period of time. I have never had surgery. Now that you have injured both knees, what will go next? At least now you have evened out the playing field. maybe one won’t be doing all the work to support the other since they are both bad. lol. I’m wishing you a speedy recovery.
I’m hoping it ends at the knees! I’ll just go get them fixed. I have a friend that’s torn her ACLs a total of 4 times and she runs marathons.
Ugh Laura I’m SO sorry this happened to you! Don’t worry though; you are strong! This experience is going to prove it to you as you work through it. I dislocated my right shoulder twice, has surgery to rebuild it, and then a year later I dislocated it twice again on separate occasions, meaning that I had to have the entire shoulder rebuilt for a second time! I felt so incredibly low, as I had to go through the entire rehabilitation process all over again when I finally was beginning to get back to where I was physically and emotionally. Eventually though I found the strength to change my perspective, sit with my discomfort, and pursue exactly how to gain the courage to heal once again. You will do the same because you are a courageous woman who has a determined character. I wish you all the best in your recovery; You can do this!
Thank you so much Janice! Always good to hear from you, too. 🙂
So sorry to hear bout your shoulder! I know that’s painful – you can’t NOT use your arms! I hope it’s all sorted out!
You are not supposed to break the Laura!
Sympathy… I have an only mildly wonky knee, and that’s enough of a nuisance. Amazing how much we use those joints! Heal well…
That made me laugh out loud! My goal is to never break… I’m going to start playing sports in bubble wrap!
Oh my gosh. Laura you aren’t being dramatic. First world problems…… whatever. This REALLY sucks and I am so sorry this has happened to you. To not be able to do the things you love and use for so much of your grounding …. it probably feels like the world is teaming up against you. Its not fair. Of course I hope you can see some silver linings etc. etc, but for now I say let yourself be as down and upset as you need. Its 150% valid. Screw groceries. Get take out and wine. Thinking of you.
Thank you Cora. You always know what to say! We managed to eat a home a little more, but the wine is here to stay. 😉
I am so sorry. Thinking about you.
Pleas keep us updated.
Thanks Abby. I know you know the struggle! 🙁
Ugh! I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Again! I take it that surgery is in the picture this time around? I don’t blame you for feeling a little sorry for yourself. It’s okay when the news really sucks. <3
Thanks Debbie. I’ll know more Friday, but I can’t function with both ACLs torn… so likely surgery. Boo.
Oh Laura this just sucks. There is no other way of putting it. Urgh and these things always happen just as you start to feel good again. I know the past few months for me have been ups and a lot of downs in terms of my health and its just a shitty time.
I hope no matter what the actual diagnosis is that they can get you in for treatment ASAP so you can start working on getting better again 🙂
Yeah, it does suck a big, fat hairy one. Thanks for the empathy… I know you’ve been fighting too! 2018 is going to be our year! 😉
oh friend. I am so sorry. YOu know we can relate. James had knee problems for 2 years. And me? well my colon is nemesis. I get it. But so thankful it will heal and you have support! here for you!
I know! Why aren’t we neighbors??? We could be commiserating over balls and wine right now. xo
Ugh, no, you aren’t being dramatic… serious injuries suck bigly (big league? I’m still confused about that idiotic term from that idiotic man ha!). An active lifestyle isn’t just about a workout here and there, it’s just that, a LIFESTYLE. It’s a big part of your life. Like you said, it’s your stress reliever and your “me” time. So I totally feel your pain and hope that you recover quicker than expected friend! And to ease any guilt about not having surgery on the other knee last time, I wanted to add that both of my brothers tore their ACLs in one knee, had surgery, then tore the other knee a year or two later as well. So it may have happened either way…. Let’s commiserate with a dinner/wine meet-up sometime soon!
LOL! Bigly is right. Now we have to add covfefe… oy. At least I have dumb ass to distract me. The story about your brothers did make me feel better! Meeting up for dinner.wine would too… let’s plan it soon.
Oh No Laura!! I’m so so so sorry to hear that, you just recovered from your last ACL tear. OMG that pop must have been really loud, ouch. My gym time is my rest time also so I can only imagine what you are going through. I love your cute little ice bag 🙂 Dinner looks soooo good.
Thanks Mary! The last one never really healed… I just got used to it. I guess I had this one coming. UGH.
So um. Yeahhhhh about that.
Can I call you a dumb dumb? LOL! I say it with as much love as I can. HAHAHAHA!
I honeslty have no idea what I would do if I hurt my knee or my legs in any way shape or form, since as you know, I am the CARDIO QUEEN! I mean, I guess I would totally just see it as a blessing in away because it would FORCE ME to get out of my crazy cardio routine. But yeah, F being injured. Even though I call you a “dumb dumb” I would probably do the same thing as you and forego surgery because F THAT NOISE… Except for being put under, that’s always a fun time!
Well. Now this dumb dumb has to go have surgery. I think, as an apology for name calling, you should have to come feed me raw salmon. I’ll even let Vegas and Landon watch. HAHAHA!!!
I can’t say that sounds like a bad time – so um. I am glad I called you names!